I haven’t been married very long. This fall we’ll be approaching our seventh wedding anniversary and I’ll be stuck trying to find a traditional wool or copper gift. I do look forward to spending every day for the rest of our lives together; some really breathtaking days, some days I’ll never want to relive, mostly just every day days filled with life’s simple ups and downs. I’m always looking to keep my marriage strong. We have small children in the home, my husband has a busy career, and the idea of “free time” makes me chuckle. In my search for ideas to keep the spark alive in my relationship I often see the suggestion of “date night.”
This married lady refuses that idea.
It’s not that I don’t date my husband (my Dominant, my Master, the man who sets my soul and body on fire). It’s that I’m always dating him.
Why should things change so much when your relationship gets serious or you get married or have kids? So much so that you have to schedule in a time on a calendar to date your spouse?
Stop scheduling a “date night” every week or, let’s be honest, every month and simply go back to dating your partner.
Whatever you were both doing in the beginning worked.
Speak in the same kind, caring, curious manner.
Treat them like what they have to say is fascinating to you, even if it’s the thousandth similar work day story.
Look in their eyes at every meal. Not a phone.
Shoulder rubs, butt swats as they walk by, hugs for no reason.
Make out with passion. Even when you’re not planning to get sex.
Make their coffee in the morning. Offer to take the garbage to the curb instead. Listen to them, really hear them, when they are speaking.
Be their whore. Send naughty texts and naked pics. Have we already forgotten the thrill of having a video recorder in our pockets? When’s the last time you sent a self made porn to your spouse? Dirty talk. Sneak off during the day for a quickie. Bust out the hitachi before bed. Wake him up with your mouth on his cock. Not because it’s “date night.”
Because you’re still dating.
Manners. Respectful conversation. Compliments. Encouragement. Excitement.
Looking forward to seeing them at the end of the day pulling into the driveway…. and telling them so.
Marriage and kids and careers and stress can indeed bog you down. Just never forget to give up on planning the perfect “date night” and instead just dating your partner.