Words for Winter

To the girl with the pain in her eyes:
You’ve worked so very hard at hiding it away,
Shielding yourself, creating rough scales of self-protection that eclipse your heart,
Spending your time weaving a tale of how good life is,
How good it was,
How good it will be,
When underneath the worry of more-love’s more-pain frosts your every breath
And the moment somebody spots that pain
The less you want them.
Once they see you they’ll leave, right?
Ah, God, to my girl with the pain in her eyes:
Let me show you that’s not the case.

To the girl with the ice in her veins:
I’m here to bring you sunshine.
I am warmth, I am young love, I am fresh starts, I am an unstoppable thaw.
Spring has arrived in your life,
A time for growth and new buds and fresh air.
There will still be a chill sometime, and that’s okay,
Cause it renders the warmth that much better when it arrives.
Hold my hand, dear Winter, and let’s watch the seasons change together, let’s make it through the thunderstorms and mud and late unanticipated final frosts of Spring and live in anticipation of the hot, lustful sun to come.
To the girl with the ice in her veins:
You’ve been frozen too long. Join me in the light of day. Shed your heavy cloak.
I know you can.
Come turn your face to the sun.

To the girl who runs from the fear:
Hold my hand tighter.
Don’t let me go. We’ll face it together.
I’ve lived this fear. I’ll live it again.
For you.
If I am opening my heart to the black void that is not knowing how this will all turn out in the end, I want to do it with you.
Big risk is big fear is your cue to run.
Run to me; run with me.
Big risk can also be big love. You just have to make it through.
You can’t go back. You wouldn’t want to go back.
One foot in front of the other. Your family in your hands.
To the girl who runs from the fear:
Stop running.
Confront it and emerge victorious.

To the girl who can never trust:
One brick at a time. One build-up of the foundation. I don’t care how long it takes to get there, all that matters is progress.
I show my dedication?
I catch you when you fall?
I don’t let you go?
One by one.
I am not anybody else. I cannot undo somebody else’s hurt.
All I can do is be myself. A flawed self. I will fuck up.
Hopefully by then the foundation will be laid and solid and indestructible and we can hold each other in the home built of love and recover together.
To the girl who can never trust:
Think about building something with me.

To the girl who’s afraid she’s not worth it:
Dear one, you couldn’t possibly be more wrong.


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